The DQ Chess Tournament

[Animators]

Codbarley still has yet to answer >_>

[go_habs_go]

yeah, invites are sent

[Paperback Writer]

Holy shit, Varth was able to open and deploy faster an I could - Must mimic.

[Varthonai]

I emerge triumphant from the scene of a 40-turn-long black-and-white massacre the likes of which haven't been seen since Schindler's List, preceded by a long and tense black-and-white standoff full of fail-deadly black-and-white traps the likes of which haven't been seen since Dr. Strangelove. DC was indeed a shifty and clever opponent in the opening and midgame. I pity his next opponent.

http://www.chess.com/echess/game.html?id=48557125

[Paperback Writer]

If fate decrees, Varth. I look forward to kicking your ass.

[Sirrin Nacht]

Ready when you are Wadling.

[Wadling]

IT BEGINS!

http://www.chess.com/echess/game.html?id=48586467

[Animators]

One day left for codbarley.

[Wadling]

Checkmate!

Hey Sirrin, remember when I said I was terrible at chess?

I lied.

Spoiler for Chatlog:

Wadling: Oh hey look there's a chat here

Wadling: Sup dude

SirrinNacht: Nothing much. How are you doing?

Wadling: Pretty good, pretty good.

Wadling: Just got rid of Mattbot, thank god.

Wadling: I hate that guy

Wadling: And am better than him at Chess

Wadling: In fact I'm better than him at most things

Wadling: And I'm not just saying this because I'm going to post the chat logs on DQ after

Wadling: I SWEAR

Wadling: Wait a minute... I just castled. This is a DQ Chess tournament...

Wadling: DQ is largely based around the Castle series

SirrinNacht: Haha, ok man.

Wadling: OHMYGOD IT'S A CONSPIRACY

SirrinNacht: Ah, the humor.

Wadling: I can't help but think you're not taking this entirely seriously, Sirrin

Wadling: Then again I could just be trying to distract you so that you make mistakes

Wadling: But I can assure you I would never do anything like that

Wadling: Ask anyone who knows me, I'm an honourable guy

Wadling: Isn't that right, Matt, Vic, Becca, Andrew, Peter, Warren and Claire who will be reading this some time in the near future

Wadling: They say yes, don't worry

Wadling: You can trust me

SirrinNacht: Don't worry dear, I can multitask.

Wadling: I'm a moderator on the site, I would NEVER lead you astray

Wadling: Good to hear, good to hear.

Wadling: That move you're thinking of doing right now?

Wadling: It's a bad idea

Wadling: That other one's the way to go

Wadling: Yeah, that one

Wadling: Well. That was an ummm. An interesting move. Yeah... Interesting...

Wadling: Okay that one genuinly screwed up my plans

Wadling: I'm telling the truth

Wadling: In case you weren't sure

SirrinNacht: Mmmm.

Wadling: Oh I wasn't taking so long because I was thinking by the way

Wadling: I was just looking up The Riddler quotes to throw at you

Wadling: Well, well. So the shaved monkey is failing. How utterly, utterly expected.

Wadling: Oh snap, that had to hurt

Wadling: Damn, I was hoping you wouldn't see that move...

Wadling: Alright I'm gonna take some risks here

Wadling: Don't screw this up for me, I have to show Mattbot up!

Wadling: Checkmate!

Wadling: Good game, good game

SirrinNacht: Oh well. My rustiness got the better of me.

SirrinNacht: Sorry I couldn't put up a better fight.

Wadling: My advice would be to not take turns as quickly as you do, 'cuz I think you forgot about a lot of pieces, which lead to them either being undefended or simply not used

Wadling: But yeah it's all about practice I guess, I hope you face Mattbot later and kick his ass

SirrinNacht: Sorry I couldn't put up a better fight.

SirrinNacht: Thanks for the advice. Also, there's something wrong with the chat on my end, which is why I posted the same message twice.

Our chat was rather one sided

[Sirrin Nacht]

I was pretty sure you were being sarcastic when you said that. Saying it in all caps was kind of a red flag.

[DrunkCat]

Awesomeness. I really wasn't expecting you guys to finish these games so quickly. This is awesome sauce.

[Sirrin Nacht]

Spoiler for Chatlog:

Wadling: Oh hey look there's a chat here

Wadling: Sup dude

SirrinNacht: Nothing much. How are you doing?

Wadling: Pretty good, pretty good.

Wadling: Just got rid of Mattbot, thank god.

Wadling: I hate that guy

Wadling: And am better than him at Chess

Wadling: In fact I'm better than him at most things

Wadling: And I'm not just saying this because I'm going to post the chat logs on DQ after

Wadling: I SWEAR

Wadling: Wait a minute... I just castled. This is a DQ Chess tournament...

Wadling: DQ is largely based around the Castle series

SirrinNacht: Haha, ok man.

Wadling: OHMYGOD IT'S A CONSPIRACY

SirrinNacht: Ah, the humor.

Wadling: I can't help but think you're not taking this entirely seriously, Sirrin

Wadling: Then again I could just be trying to distract you so that you make mistakes

Wadling: But I can assure you I would never do anything like that

Wadling: Ask anyone who knows me, I'm an honourable guy

Wadling: Isn't that right, Matt, Vic, Becca, Andrew, Peter, Warren and Claire who will be reading this some time in the near future

Wadling: They say yes, don't worry

Wadling: You can trust me

SirrinNacht: Don't worry dear, I can multitask.

Wadling: I'm a moderator on the site, I would NEVER lead you astray

Wadling: Good to hear, good to hear.

Wadling: That move you're thinking of doing right now?

Wadling: It's a bad idea

Wadling: That other one's the way to go

Wadling: Yeah, that one

Wadling: Well. That was an ummm. An interesting move. Yeah... Interesting...

Wadling: Okay that one genuinly screwed up my plans

Wadling: I'm telling the truth

Wadling: In case you weren't sure

SirrinNacht: Mmmm.

Wadling: Oh I wasn't taking so long because I was thinking by the way

Wadling: I was just looking up The Riddler quotes to throw at you

Wadling: Well, well. So the shaved monkey is failing. How utterly, utterly expected.

Wadling: Oh snap, that had to hurt

Wadling: Damn, I was hoping you wouldn't see that move...

Wadling: Alright I'm gonna take some risks here

Wadling: Don't screw this up for me, I have to show Mattbot up!

Wadling: Checkmate!

Wadling: Good game, good game

SirrinNacht: Oh well. My rustiness got the better of me.

SirrinNacht: Sorry I couldn't put up a better fight.

Wadling: My advice would be to not take turns as quickly as you do, 'cuz I think you forgot about a lot of pieces, which lead to them either being undefended or simply not used

Wadling: But yeah it's all about practice I guess, I hope you face Mattbot later and kick his ass

SirrinNacht: Sorry I couldn't put up a better fight.

SirrinNacht: Thanks for the advice. Also, there's something wrong with the chat on my end, which is why I posted the same message twice.

Our chat was rather one sided

I'm a tad antisocial.

[Polo]

I'm a tad antisocial.

*unsocial. I cannot stress this correction any further. If you were anti-social you would be seething at the mouth and trying to punch Will or something to that degree.

[Mattbot]

I skimmed the chat, something about Vic being the Riddler. Makes sense when you think about it

[Sirrin Nacht]

I suppose.

[Shinoi]

This thread is pure platinum. I just love those chatlogs.

[Wadling]

Polo challenged me to a game too, off the books you might say.

http://www.chess.com/echess/game.html?id=48589195

[Polo]

It was quite thrilling.
Chat log for funs:

Spoiler for duedlyfirearms:

poloxgs: lets try to reserve this chat for insults only
Wadling: Okay, dickwad
poloxgs: you willy-eyed pissant!
poloxgs: oh fuck im freaking out here
poloxgs: I'll be honest i have no idea what im doing here
Wadling: You're freaking out already?
poloxgs: yes
Wadling: I HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED KICKING YOUR ASS YET
poloxgs: i am the worst
poloxgs: i havent even started to get my ass kicked
poloxgs: wat
Wadling: CASTLED YEAH!
poloxgs: quit... castling everywhere AFGHHG
poloxgs: hey will, use your knight on that pawn please
Wadling: I almost did
Wadling: And then I was like
Wadling: Waaaiiiit a minute
poloxgs: YOU ARE THE WORST
poloxgs: haha oaky fuck this im just going for it
poloxgs: RAAAMBO
Wadling: Yup, moving that pawn one space sure was Rambo of you
poloxgs: i meant rambo in the sense that this is the game of chess, i shall rambo it
poloxgs: but it will take a while before its clear im ramboing because i can only move one piece at a time
Wadling: :3
poloxgs: from my perspective, at least, i just rambo'd very hard. oh so very hard.
Wadling: Alright I'll Rambo it a bit too
poloxgs: oh god two spaces. ARE YOU MAD.
Wadling: FIRST BLOOD
poloxgs: hey you're trying to use my own pawn against me to allow your castle to nom up MY castle...
poloxgs: I SHANT ALLOW IT
poloxgs: maybe i shouldnt speak out loud
poloxgs: *out text?
Wadling: CURSES
poloxgs: quit trying to weasel me out o' mah 'ole
poloxgs: i didnt really want to end up moving backwards on the board for a second so touché
poloxgs: uuuuuuuh fuck
Wadling: Oh snap, that's right bro
Wadling: Pawns can take other pawns like that
Wadling: Did you know that?
Wadling: YOU DO NOW!
poloxgs: HOW
poloxgs: IS THIS SOME KIND OF CHRISTIAN MAGIC?!
poloxgs: you're en passant
poloxgs: meant
poloxgs: you're an pissant
poloxgs: >: I
Wadling: That heroic pawn
poloxgs: AH FREAKING OUT NOW
Wadling: AND THUS THE KNIGHT IS SAVED FROM THE PAWN
poloxgs: THE BISHOP IS PISSED
Wadling: Go ahead, Paul
Wadling: Take the knight
Wadling: Make
Wadling: My
Wadling: Day
Wadling: Oh
Wadling: Okay...
poloxgs: BISHOPS ARE EXPENDABLE YOU KNOW THIS
poloxgs: oh wait no they're not oh fuck
Wadling: PAUL JUST ROLL OVER AND DIE ALREADY
poloxgs: not without a fight!!
poloxgs: stupid castle and porn... pawn defense
poloxgs: STUPIDIDSF
poloxgs: im pretty close to conceding here
poloxgs: well that was just
poloxgs: the worst move i have ever done
poloxgs: amongst many
poloxgs: Hah
poloxgs: just like how your pawn becomes a queen on the other side of the board
poloxgs: my knight becomes a useless piece of shit on your side of the board
Wadling: The fuck is that knight doing
Wadling: IT MATTERS NOT
Wadling: CHECKMATE
poloxgs: well played
poloxgs: even i did get murdered

(just in case the in-game chat does not show for you guys)

[DrunkCat]

More clarifications and improvements (because I suck at this):
Added Round start date. Games are to start within 3 Days from round starting date. A match is to last no longer than one week from starting date.

[Zola]

It was quite thrilling.
Chat log for funs:

Spoiler for duedlyfirearms:

poloxgs: lets try to reserve this chat for insults only
Wadling: Okay, dickwad
poloxgs: you willy-eyed pissant!
poloxgs: oh fuck im freaking out here
poloxgs: I'll be honest i have no idea what im doing here
Wadling: You're freaking out already?
poloxgs: yes
Wadling: I HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED KICKING YOUR ASS YET
poloxgs: i am the worst
poloxgs: i havent even started to get my ass kicked
poloxgs: wat
Wadling: CASTLED YEAH!
poloxgs: quit... castling everywhere AFGHHG
poloxgs: hey will, use your knight on that pawn please
Wadling: I almost did
Wadling: And then I was like
Wadling: Waaaiiiit a minute
poloxgs: YOU ARE THE WORST
poloxgs: haha oaky fuck this im just going for it
poloxgs: RAAAMBO
Wadling: Yup, moving that pawn one space sure was Rambo of you
poloxgs: i meant rambo in the sense that this is the game of chess, i shall rambo it
poloxgs: but it will take a while before its clear im ramboing because i can only move one piece at a time
Wadling: :3
poloxgs: from my perspective, at least, i just rambo'd very hard. oh so very hard.
Wadling: Alright I'll Rambo it a bit too
poloxgs: oh god two spaces. ARE YOU MAD.
Wadling: FIRST BLOOD
poloxgs: hey you're trying to use my own pawn against me to allow your castle to nom up MY castle...
poloxgs: I SHANT ALLOW IT
poloxgs: maybe i shouldnt speak out loud
poloxgs: *out text?
Wadling: CURSES
poloxgs: quit trying to weasel me out o' mah 'ole
poloxgs: i didnt really want to end up moving backwards on the board for a second so touché
poloxgs: uuuuuuuh fuck
Wadling: Oh snap, that's right bro
Wadling: Pawns can take other pawns like that
Wadling: Did you know that?
Wadling: YOU DO NOW!
poloxgs: HOW
poloxgs: IS THIS SOME KIND OF CHRISTIAN MAGIC?!
poloxgs: you're en passant
poloxgs: meant
poloxgs: you're an pissant
poloxgs: >: I
Wadling: That heroic pawn
poloxgs: AH FREAKING OUT NOW
Wadling: AND THUS THE KNIGHT IS SAVED FROM THE PAWN
poloxgs: THE BISHOP IS PISSED
Wadling: Go ahead, Paul
Wadling: Take the knight
Wadling: Make
Wadling: My
Wadling: Day
Wadling: Oh
Wadling: Okay...
poloxgs: BISHOPS ARE EXPENDABLE YOU KNOW THIS
poloxgs: oh wait no they're not oh fuck
Wadling: PAUL JUST ROLL OVER AND DIE ALREADY
poloxgs: not without a fight!!
poloxgs: stupid castle and porn... pawn defense
poloxgs: STUPIDIDSF
poloxgs: im pretty close to conceding here
poloxgs: well that was just
poloxgs: the worst move i have ever done
poloxgs: amongst many
poloxgs: Hah
poloxgs: just like how your pawn becomes a queen on the other side of the board
poloxgs: my knight becomes a useless piece of shit on your side of the board
Wadling: The fuck is that knight doing
Wadling: IT MATTERS NOT
Wadling: CHECKMATE
poloxgs: well played
poloxgs: even i did get murdered

(just in case the in-game chat does not show for you guys)

You two forced me to cry XD
Haven't played chess in years, I'll start to practice for the next tournament
Shino let's play

[Polo]

http://www.chess.com/echess/game.html?id=48597818

Another off the tournament game. Strategy for this game was to threaten Varths king as much as possible, causing me to fuck up a lot. :3

Spoiler for itkeepshappening:

(10:29:49 AM) Paul: challenge sent out
(10:29:55 AM) Paul: sausages cooked
(10:29:56 AM) Paul: coffee to get
10:30
(10:30:01 AM) Paul: chess to endure
(10:30:22 AM) Varthonai: :3
(10:33:21 AM) Paul: shortest match i've ever had
(10:33:40 AM) Paul: i made 2 moves started from the beginning of the game and got check mated
(10:33:46 AM) Paul: by a level 2 computer
(10:33:46 AM) Paul: :C
(10:33:56 AM) Varthonai: :ha:
10:35
(10:35:42 AM) Paul: im WAAAAAIIITING
(10:37:04 AM) Paul: oh wow im stupid
(10:37:07 AM) Paul: so very stupid
(10:37:12 AM) Paul: :x
10:40
(10:40:16 AM) Paul: and the moron reward goes to: paul
(10:40:32 AM) Paul: if he could make it up onto stage without shitting his pants and hitting his head on the stairs
(10:43:13 AM) Varthonai: :ha:
(10:43:22 AM) Varthonai: s'cool bro
(10:43:25 AM) Varthonai: thanks for playing :3
10:45
(10:46:55 AM) Paul: after zis
(10:47:06 AM) Paul: after siz brutal manzlautherh
(10:47:12 AM) Paul: i need to show you shit, nothing big
(10:47:18 AM) Paul: musical shit... not my music
(10:47:18 AM) Varthonai: ok
(10:47:20 AM) Paul: but its still cool
(10:47:27 AM) Varthonai: ossim
(10:47:34 AM) Paul: quite screwing my plans over :C
11:00
(11:01:14 AM) Varthonai: goodness gracious, paul
(11:01:17 AM) Varthonai: that was a master stroke
(11:01:30 AM) Varthonai: you might win now
(11:04:54 AM) Paul: .-.
11:05
(11:05:22 AM) Paul: my tactic for this game was to threaten your king as much as possible
(11:07:49 AM) Varthonai: lost your chance
(11:07:55 AM) Paul: snap.
(11:08:55 AM) Paul: still, by having two rooks and a knight i can still pose a pretty nasty thread
(11:08:59 AM) Paul: *threat
(11:09:20 AM) Paul: oh you bastard
11:15
(11:16:02 AM) Varthonai: :3
(11:17:00 AM) Paul: i really wish i knew what my master stroke was <:3
(11:17:55 AM) Varthonai: taking my rook way back when
(11:18:03 AM) Varthonai: you had an opportunity to take my other one too
(11:18:13 AM) Varthonai: but you passed it up to threaten my king some more
(11:18:15 AM) Paul: ah fuck freaking out here
(11:18:29 AM) Paul: i needed him!!
11:20
(11:21:39 AM) Varthonai: long live the queen
(11:21:56 AM) Paul: i like killing queenies twice
(11:21:58 AM) Varthonai: the queen is dead
(11:22:07 AM) Varthonai: shortest reign ever
(11:22:07 AM) Paul: wait
(11:22:32 AM) Paul: and now i am screweed
(11:22:36 AM) Paul: i had to take your bait though
(11:22:37 AM) Varthonai: :33
(11:22:39 AM) Paul: it was dangerous bait
11:25
(11:25:05 AM) Paul: your rook is just raping all of my pieces
(11:25:10 AM) Paul: this really isnt cool
(11:25:24 AM) Varthonai: rape isn't… cool?
(11:25:31 AM) Paul: oh no of course it is
(11:25:34 AM) Varthonai: when did that happen
(11:25:36 AM) Varthonai: oh good
(11:26:07 AM) Paul: its just not cool when its happening to my pawns
(11:26:22 AM) Paul: it was totally hot when you did it to my queen though
(11:27:14 AM) Varthonai: oh ok
(11:27:20 AM) Varthonai: I'll stop raping pawns then
(11:27:25 AM) Varthonai: don't really need to anymore
(11:27:34 AM) Paul: FORM A LINE
(11:27:37 AM) Paul: fuuuuckj
11:30
(11:31:43 AM) Paul: well shit i might as well concede
(11:31:47 AM) Paul: you can checkmate me now
(11:32:09 AM) Varthonai: yurp
(11:32:16 AM) Varthonai: s'what I'm tryin to do
(11:32:23 AM) Paul: :3
(11:32:27 AM) Paul: i lasted longer than i expected
(11:33:17 AM) Paul: well
(11:33:17 AM) Paul: GG
(11:33:44 AM) Varthonai: indeed
11:35
(11:35:17 AM) Paul: just check mate me already ; - ;
(11:35:33 AM) Varthonai: I have to get you to an edge first mate
(11:35:47 AM) Paul: nah you can just put the rook and the queen next to one another
(11:35:54 AM) Paul: while the king is at least 2 spaces away
(11:35:58 AM) Paul: vertically speaking
(11:36:39 AM) Paul: just move your rook to f3
(11:36:49 AM) Paul: i won't take it <:3
(11:36:55 AM) Paul: that would be incredibly superfluous of me
(11:38:08 AM) Varthonai: of course not
(11:38:12 AM) Paul: oh fine! do the corner thing
(11:38:17 AM) Paul: >: [
(11:38:53 AM) Varthonai: doesn't need to be a corner
(11:38:56 AM) Varthonai: just an edge
(11:39:04 AM) Varthonai: I can do it this turn
(11:39:31 AM) Paul: DO THE FUCKING CORNER THING
(11:39:44 AM) Varthonai: I DID THE CORNERY THING
(11:39:49 AM) Paul: YOU FUCK YOU.
(11:39:57 AM) Varthonai: I AM THE HEIR OF CORNER
11:40
(11:40:02 AM) Varthonai: IT'S ME
(11:40:06 AM) Paul: and I am the turd of corner
(11:40:17 AM) Paul: ew... just ew
(11:40:23 AM) Paul: who went and took a shit in the corner of the battle field

[Polo]

http://www.chess.com/echess/game.html?id=48636792

Another off-the-side chess match.

[DrunkCat]

Update, I've not received nor have seen posted Rockonman/Go_habs_go match. That means that there's a whole pairing up for grabs. To get this round done sooner rather than later, entry will open up to the first two players to finish a match with the title "DQ Round 1" and which adheres to all previously stated rules (ranked, 1day, standard). After Round 1, there will be no more changes to the entries.

[go_habs_go]

we have started our match already, we both forgot to tell it i think :$

[Sirrin Nacht]

MY GAME HAS BEEN ABORTED BY ONE OF THE PLAYERS AND SEEING AS I DIDN'T DO IT I CAN ONLY ASSUME THAT SIRRIN NACHT HAS FORFEITED IN THE FACE OF EXTREME DANGER! I WIN!

What the fudge? I didn't abort that game either. That game was already aborted when I first saw it.