Stick mafia war trailer

[paolo_viper]

http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/294607
well this is the improved

version I told you its coming
I didnt cut the music becauss it wont

import it :(
Well reply :)

[Silhouette]

4/10 It looks alright with the basic storyline and everything

but as Warlud said make your own stuff don't take preloaders from other

sites unless you are a member of their animation crew. The animation was

choppy and the effects need lots of work (blood and explosions) and finally

watch is spelt WATCH not wach.

[Devastation]

it was a bit better than the other one, but id

only give it 4.5 out of 10. reasons:
The blood, dont soften fill edges it

makes alot of things look cheap and n00bulare.

Choppyness, you should

just slow down, alot of the animation is very choppy ruins the atmosphere of

the movie.

Spelling, work on the first text (if you are under 13 etc)

make it shorter and spell 'wach' watch, and the name' boby' is generaly

spelt bobbie.

General, all in all it looks like it was put together in

1 day, and therefore quite crap, just remember to have patience, the biggest

flaw ( for me anyway) is the blood, make it more fluid and dont soften fill

edge it. keep trying

[VipER X]

increase the frame rate! thats your BIGGEST flaw! INCREASE

IT! and yeah make it more detailed. the characters really need to be

improved, of it's your style to make them all black then keep it but i would

suggest non-eyed sticks with different colours and mouths for speaking. i

think you should keep it simple but its up to you of course. 6.5/10,

[Jaded]

its

sorta hard to read the text. i like the concept but you should improve the

fighting it seems a bit robotronic, other than that pretty good i guess,

7/10

[VipER X]

^ true! and also yes

spend more time n your animations, as i said in the other topic, and you

shouldn't of made a new topic for this!

[Fu]

5

things:
1. the text at the beggining was really hard to read, and it was

there for like 10 minutes
2. you can see the individual frames, you want

it to be more like a film, than gallery of frames
3. The movements were

choppy, increase the frame rate or add some in between
4. You overused the

filter effects again *sigh*
5. The graphics were overly simple.

[VipER X]

and all of those

things can be done with patience! :D

[IceBreaker]

6 OUT OF 10

Thats all i have to say.

[A.M.]

looks like you quickly

tried to make it. Spend more time and get more into it. But nice none the

less

[Heavy-Gear]

Was it just me or was there

transparent boxes around alot of the objects like blood and

stuff...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v171/ordox/Box2.gif[/i

mg]
[img]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v171/ordox/Box1.gif




Was that on purpose? :(

Hmmm... In pretty much everything you do you

seem really good at adding effects and stuff (like the light on the body

after the muzzle flash) But you need to improve on your basic animating

skills like movement and blood and stuff. Overall i give it a

4.5/10

Instead of trying to go for the whole cinematic movie thing

straight away, try just practice drawing fluid moving sticks. :)

[A.M.]

I liked the scene with the guy bloody and with the

sword...hmm kinda like the picture from CASTLE 3!!!!!!!

[VipER X]

there are boxes

around them! maybe its the effect of and effect? lol

[paolo_viper]

Was it just me or was there transparent boxes around alot

of the objects like blood and

stuff...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v171/ordox/Box2.gif[/i

mg]
[img]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v171/ordox/Box1.gif




Was that on purpose? :(

Hmmm... In pretty much everything you do you

seem really good at adding effects and stuff (like the light on the body

after the muzzle flash) But you need to improve on your basic animating

skills like movement and blood and stuff. Overall i give it a

4.5/10

Instead of trying to go for the whole cinematic movie thing

straight away, try just practice drawing fluid moving sticks.

:)
Your computer sucks

[Fu]

Was it just me or was there transparent

boxes around alot of the objects like blood and

stuff...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v171/ordox/Box2.gif[/i

mg]
[img]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v171/ordox/Box1.gif




Was that on purpose? :(

Hmmm... In pretty much everything you do you

seem really good at adding effects and stuff (like the light on the body

after the muzzle flash) But you need to improve on your basic animating

skills like movement and blood and stuff. Overall i give it a

4.5/10

Instead of trying to go for the whole cinematic movie thing

straight away, try just practice drawing fluid moving sticks.

:)
Your computer sucks

well, maybe you should take

in the advice instead of critisizing them lol I agree with Heavy_gear you

really should pratice on the basic animating skills, but your effects are

really quite good keep it up.

[Netrosis]

ffs Paolo... You've tripped me this time.

QUIT posting EVERY

single FREAKIN thing you DO!!! Take a month of your life and go and attempt

to improve, and NO, don't post it on newgrounds, keep it to yourself.

Attempt to actually animate realistically. Go find some tutorials and LEARN

how to do specific special effects, IMPROVE upon your style and learn to

animate it well.

I'm sick of you changing a few things and then

posting it again "oooh remake" "oooh I did this.. blah blah". Honestly,

you're still just like every other stick noob out there that starts out with

shabby stick.. well you could barely call them animations.

Now

honestly, with those boxes, they are usually associated with the ALPHA

channels. Make sure you don't have something with an alpha of 0 anywhere,

that will give that problem.

1 / 10.

[fedora]

Paolo,

Please

don't make another trailer after this.

Make the actual animation!



:)

Speaking of which, when do you propose it'll be done.